Broken nights are part of life with a newborn, and they do not last forever. Here is why your baby wakes so often, how to claw back some rest, and the NHS safe-sleep rules that matter most when you are running on empty.
Last reviewed 12 October 2026 · Checked against NHS guidance · 13 min read
The short answer
Newborns wake through the night because they have tiny tummies and need to be fed, so broken sleep is expected, and the NHS stresses that this phase will not last forever. To cope, rest when your baby sleeps, share the nights if you have a partner, and accept help from friends and family. Most importantly, keep your baby safe when you are exhausted: never fall asleep with your baby on a sofa or armchair, put them back in their own cot before you go to sleep, and never share a bed with them if you are extremely tired. If you cannot sleep even when your baby is asleep, or you feel low or hopeless, talk to your GP, midwife or health visitor.
Food matters for energy too, and our guide to what to eat while breastfeeding covers that side. Every point comes from current NHS guidance.
Why newborns wake so often
Night waking is not a sign you are doing something wrong. The NHS says it is highly unlikely a newborn will sleep through the night, because they have tiny tummies and need to be fed. Babies wake in the night because they are hungry, and being too hot or too cold can also disturb their sleep.
The amount newborns sleep varies widely. Some sleep around 8 hours a day in total, others up to around 18 hours, and both are normal. The catch is that it comes in short stretches around the clock. The NHS also points out that it is very common for babies to fall asleep while being held and then wake when they are put down in their cot, because they want to be near you. Do not worry if your baby does not settle straight away in a Moses basket or cot.
When does it get better?
Sleep patterns change as your baby grows. According to the NHS, between 3 and 6 months babies need fewer night feeds, so they may be able to sleep for longer. By around 6 months, some babies may sleep for up to 12 hours at night, although teething and hunger can still wake them. Every baby is different, so try not to compare yours with others. As the NHS puts it, the phase when your baby wakes several times a night will not last forever.
Helping your baby learn day from night
In the day, the NHS suggests opening the curtains, playing games and not worrying about everyday noise while they nap. At night, keep the lights low and do not play with your baby. A simple, soothing bedtime routine may also help them settle.
6 NHS ways to get more rest
The NHS says it is completely normal for parents to feel exhausted in the first weeks or months after having a baby, and that lack of sleep can leave you physically and emotionally drained. These are the practical steps it recommends:
- Rest when your baby sleepsIt is tempting to use this time for chores, but rest matters more. Set an alarm if you are worried about sleeping for too long.
- Share the nights if you canIf you have a partner, ask them to help. How you split it depends on how your baby is fed: see the next section.
- Accept or ask for helpA relative or friend could come round and look after your baby while you have a nap. If you are on your own, see if someone could stay with you for a few days.
- Put off non-essential jobsHousework that is not essential can wait. In the first few weeks, giving yourself time to adjust matters more than doing things "right".
- Eat well and drink waterEat a balanced diet. The NHS tiredness advice adds regular meals, water (mild dehydration can make you tired) and going easy on caffeine, whose effects can last up to 7 hours.
- Get outside and movingRegular exercise can help you feel less tired. Try to get out for a walk every day with your baby, even if it is just to the shops.
If you are breastfeeding, caffeine also passes to your baby, which our guide to the 200mg caffeine limit explains. For food that takes minutes, not effort, see our easy meals for new parents.
Sharing the nights: what works for each feeding type
The NHS advice on sharing the nights changes depending on whether you breastfeed, formula feed or do both. Here is how each looks in practice:
Breastfeeding
Ask your partner to help with nappies or dressing in the morning so you can go back to sleep. Once you are into a good breastfeeding routine, your partner could occasionally give a bottle of expressed breast milk during the night.
Formula feeding
Your partner can share the feeds. Whoever does the night bottles can follow our step-by-step guide to making up a formula feed.
Both
A partner can cover some night feeds with formula or expressed milk. Our combination feeding guide explains how to plan this while protecting your milk supply.
If you express for night bottles, check how long expressed breast milk keeps in the fridge and freezer before you build a stash.
Night shift planner (quick)
Two taps for a simple split idea based on NHS advice, plus the safe-sleep reminders for tired nights. Nothing is saved.
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Your suggested split and safe-sleep reminders will appear here.
A starting idea, not a rulebook. Sleep for New Parents helps you share the night shift, grab real rest and keep baby's sleep safe when exhausted. For a closer look, see our guide: What to Eat With a Newborn.
Keeping your baby safe when you are exhausted
Safe-sleep habits slip when you are exhausted, so know the NHS rules well enough to follow them half-asleep. Sudden infant death syndrome (SIDS) is the sudden, unexplained death of an apparently healthy baby. The NHS says it is more likely in the first 6 months, can affect babies up to 12 months old, and can happen any time a baby is asleep, day or night.
- 1On their back for every sleep. If they roll, move them onto their back until they can roll both ways by themselves.
- 2Feet to foot: feet nearest the foot of the cot or Moses basket.
- 3Clear cot, firm flat mattress: no pillows, duvets, cot bumpers, loose blankets, soft toys, pods or nests.
- 4Same room as you, in a separate cot or Moses basket, for every sleep for at least the first 6 months.
- 5Not too hot or cold: keep the room between 16C and 20C.
- 6Never on a sofa or armchair: do not sleep there with your baby.
The sofa ruleThe NHS warns that falling asleep on a sofa or chair with your baby can increase the risk of SIDS substantially. If you feel yourself drifting off during a feed on the sofa, put your baby down in their cot or Moses basket first.
The NHS puts it simply: it is lovely to have your baby with you for a cuddle or a feed, but it is safest to put them back in their cot before you go to sleep. The other rules on the NHS list matter just as much on tired nights:
Do
- Breastfeed if you can: breast milk protects your baby from infections and diseases.
- Think about using a dummy to settle your baby to sleep. Some research suggests this can help lower the risk of SIDS.
- Keep your baby up to date with their routine NHS vaccinations.
- Use lightweight blankets, sheets or a baby sleeping bag, and remove layers if their skin is hot or sweaty.
Do not
- Sleep on a sofa or in an armchair with your baby.
- Smoke during pregnancy or around your baby, or let anyone smoke in the same room as them.
- Let your baby stay in a car seat for too long. Take them out as soon as you arrive.
- Let them sleep with a hot water bottle or electric blanket, next to a radiator, heater or fire, or in direct sunlight.
- Leave hats and extra layers on once you come indoors or get into a car, bus or train.
If you might end up co-sleeping
The NHS says the safest place for your baby to sleep is a separate cot or Moses basket in the same room as you. It also says that if you do share a bed with your baby at any time, it is important to know how to do it safely. Tiredness is central here: the NHS says you should never co-sleep with your baby if you are extremely tired, or if your baby has a fever or any signs of illness.
Do not share a bed with your baby if...
- they were born premature (before 37 weeks of pregnancy) or had a low birthweight (less than 2.5kg or 5.5lb)
- you or your partner smoke, no matter where or when you smoke, even if you never smoke in bed
- you or your partner have had 2 or more units of alcohol
- you or your partner have taken recreational drugs
- you or your partner have taken medicine that makes you feel sleepy (drowsy)
Co-sleeping more safely
If you do share a bed, the NHS says to:
- put your baby on a firm, flat mattress, lying on their back
- keep pillows, sheets and blankets away from your baby
- not swaddle your baby (baby sleeping bags are safer)
- not have other babies, children or pets in the bed at the same time
- never leave your baby alone in an adult bed; if no adult is in bed with them, put them in a crib, cot or Moses basket
- make sure your baby cannot fall out of bed or become trapped between the mattress and the wall
When the crying gets too much
Hours of crying on little sleep can push anyone to the edge, and the NHS says many parents feel this way. Common reasons include hunger, a dirty nappy, tiredness and wind. Holding your baby close, gentle background noise or stroking their back may help.
If you feel you cannot cope, the NHS advice is to put your baby somewhere safe, such as their cot or pram, and go into another room to calm down. Set a time limit, for example 10 minutes, then go back. Never shake your baby: shaking can cause serious brain damage. Ask for help, and you can call the Cry-sis helpline on 0800 448 0737 (9am to 10pm, 7 days a week).
Is it tiredness, baby blues or postnatal depression?
Exhaustion and low mood overlap, which makes it hard to tell what is going on. One clue the NHS highlights: if you cannot sleep at night even when your baby is asleep, or you feel down, tired all the time and hopeless, these could be signs of postnatal depression, not just broken nights.
| What it is | When | What the NHS says | Action |
|---|---|---|---|
| Baby blues | A few days after the birth | Feeling down, anxious or irritable is very common and usually goes within 2 weeks of the birth. | Rest and support Get help if it lasts longer, gets worse or you are struggling |
| Postnatal depression | In pregnancy, soon after birth or up to a year after | A common mental health condition. Signs include low mood, finding it hard to enjoy anything, feeling hopeless, guilty or like a bad parent, anxiety, difficulty sleeping even when you get time to rest, and difficulty bonding with your baby. It usually improves in 3 to 6 months but can last longer. | Talk to your GP, midwife or health visitor |
| Postpartum psychosis | Usually suddenly, within the first 2 weeks | A serious mental illness, treated as a medical emergency. Signs include hallucinations, delusions, mania, rapidly changing moods and confusion. The person may not realise they are ill. | Urgent: same-day GP, 111, or 999 if in danger |
The NHS notes that fathers and partners can also have depression after having a baby. Speak to a professional even if you have only some of the signs.
Who to contact, and when
- Your GP or health visitorIf you feel very tired and are struggling to cope, or if overwhelming tiredness does not get better with rest and sleep. Your GP, midwife or health visitor is also the first call if you think you might have postnatal depression.
- NHS talking therapiesYou can refer yourself directly, without seeing a GP first (if you are 18 or over, or 16 or over in some areas).
- NHS 111For urgent mental health help, use 111 online or call 111 and select the mental health option. Call 111 too if you are worried your baby might be ill, or you cannot reach a GP about possible postpartum psychosis.
- Samaritans 116 123If you need someone to talk to, you can call Samaritans at any time.
- 999 or A&EIf someone's life is at risk or you cannot keep yourself or someone else safe. Call 999 if your baby stops breathing, will not wake, is struggling for breath, has a fit, turns pale, blue or grey, or is floppy and unresponsive. Do not drive yourself to A&E.
Looking after each other
The NHS notes that new parents are tired and have far less time for each other, and that partners may feel left out while you may resent what you see as a lack of support. Its advice is practical: your partner cannot read your mind, so talk about how things are changing, share the housework and childcare so you have more time together, and make time for each other when you can.
- Relate offers relationship counselling, some of it free.
- Coram Family Lives runs a free parenting helpline on 0808 800 2222 (Monday to Friday 9am to 9pm, weekends 10am to 3pm).
- Home-Start supports parents and carers through a parent-helper visiting scheme, which can be a lifeline if you are on your own.
Finding the nights are straining things between you? Your Relationship After Having a Baby helps you share the load and talk it through. For a closer look, see our guide: Hot Flushes and Night Sweats.
Want a plan for the nights ahead?
Our courses turn these essentials into a routine you can follow on very little sleep.
Sleep for New Parents
Share the night shift, grab real rest and keep your baby's sleep safe when you are exhausted.
Your Relationship After Having a Baby
Support each other and share the load through the newborn months.
Postnatal Nutrition
Easy meals, one-handed snacks, a freezer plan and hydration. No diets, no counting.
Related guides
- Combination feeding guide: sharing night feeds while protecting your milk supply.
- Easy meals for new parents: quick food for tired days.
- Breast milk storage (UK): how long expressed milk keeps for night bottles.
Questions parents ask
How do you cope with no sleep with a newborn?
The NHS suggests resting when your baby sleeps (set an alarm if you are worried about oversleeping), sharing the nights with a partner if you can, asking friends or relatives to watch your baby while you nap, putting off non-essential jobs, eating a balanced diet and getting out for a walk each day.
Why does my newborn wake up so often at night?
Newborns have tiny tummies and need to be fed, so the NHS says it is highly unlikely they will sleep through the night. Being too hot or too cold can also disturb their sleep. Between 3 and 6 months babies need fewer night feeds and may sleep for longer.
Is it safe to fall asleep with my baby on the sofa?
No. The NHS says do not sleep on a sofa or in an armchair with your baby, as falling asleep on a sofa or chair with your baby can increase the risk of SIDS substantially. If you might fall asleep, put your baby back in their cot or Moses basket first.
Can I co-sleep with my baby if I am exhausted?
No. The NHS says you should never co-sleep with your baby if you are extremely tired, or if your baby has a fever or signs of illness. The safest place for your baby to sleep is a separate cot or Moses basket in the same room as you.
How can my partner help at night if I am breastfeeding?
The NHS suggests your partner helps with nappies or dressing in the morning so you can go back to sleep. Once you are into a good breastfeeding routine, your partner could occasionally give a bottle of expressed breast milk during the night.
How do I know if it is tiredness or postnatal depression?
Baby blues usually pass within 2 weeks of the birth. If you cannot sleep even when your baby is asleep, feel tired all the time, low or hopeless, or no longer enjoy things, these could be signs of postnatal depression. Talk to your GP, midwife or health visitor.
Sources
- NHS: Sleep and tiredness after having a baby (last reviewed 24 August 2026)
- NHS: Reduce the risk of sudden infant death syndrome (SIDS) (last reviewed 25 November 2025)
- NHS Best Start in Life: Safer sleep
- NHS Best Start in Life: Your baby's sleep patterns
- NHS Best Start in Life: Helping your baby sleep
- NHS: Helping your baby to sleep
- NHS: Soothing a crying baby (last reviewed 22 April 2026)
- NHS: Postnatal depression (last reviewed 18 March 2026)
- NHS: Postpartum psychosis
- NHS: Where to get urgent help for mental health
- NHS: Self-help tips to fight tiredness
- NHS: Relationships after having a baby (last reviewed 20 May 2026)
This article is general information based on UK public health guidance. It is not medical advice. If you are worried about your baby's sleep or health, or about your own mood or tiredness, speak to your health visitor, midwife or GP. In an emergency, call 999.
